In a 1970s heavyweight championship boxing match, former champion Muhammad Ali was outmatched by a younger, stronger opponent by the name of George Foreman (who recently passed away).
To overcome the odds and win the fight, Ali perfected a strategy that is now known as the “rope-a-dope.”
On several occasions during the match, Ali pretended to be trapped against the ropes and goaded Foreman into throwing a flurry of punches to attempt a knockout.
Ali was easily able to absorb and block the blows while Foreman flailed away, throwing ineffective punches and expending much-needed energy in the process.
All this left Foreman exhausted, punched out…and then knocked out.
Ali’s rope-a-dope strategy regained him the championship belt.
Sometimes people resist feedback using a similar metaphorical strategy. The feedback equivalent of the rope-a-dope is known by many names but is commonly referred to as Happy Talk.
When using happy talk to resist feedback, a team member quickly agrees to whatever feedback is offered in hopes of cutting short the conversation.
They often express optimism about incorporating the feedback. They’ll even extend heartfelt thanks for the suggestions! All the while, they have no earthly intention of taking the feedback seriously.
This is simply a ruse to keep the leader satisfied. The truth is, they just want the leader and the feedback to go away.
They do this to protect themselves against the sting of feedback and to maintain the status quo. They shake their heads in agreement, smile, say nice things, and go back to how things were before the feedback. Their inner voice says, “I’m not going to do or think about this, but thanks for the suggestion.”
They wield happy talk like a shield without ever having the intention of changing their behavior or making improvements based upon the feedback.
Every team member has the right to disagree with the feedback, criticism, and evaluation they receive from others. Accepting what they believe to be actionable and accurate and ignoring feedback they deem as misinformed or uninformed is a critical part of the improvement process.
But rather than digest, debate, or engage with the feedback they receive, some team members have perfected the happy talk strategy to avoid making any changes.
The next time you hear, “Got it!” or “Okay” without any elaboration, or “Will do” without committing to any specifics or actions, ask yourself if you are being fed happy talk.
Good leaders are always on the lookout for happy talk and push through this resistance by being specific with their recommendations and by following up afterward to make sure the feedback has been considered and applied.
Good leaders don’t fall for happy talk.
They expect colleagues to take their feedback seriously and to make the necessary changes to improve performance. They are delighted to debate or discuss their criticisms but don’t let others use happy talk todeflect them.
