The greatest lie leaders tell themselves is not a falsehood, but an insistence on looking the other way. They purposely choose to live in denial of what everyone knows and sees because it serves their self-interest to do so.
Leaders in denial discard feedback, eschew contrary data, and ignore what is in front of their faces. When everyone points to the sky, they remain focused on the ground. They repel any other view than the one they hold. And then they dig in, refusing to entertain any information that contradicts their position or opinion.
For leaders, denial is a method of self-protection from the truth. When the truth is too painful to accept, then avoidance seems like a logical path.
Sometimes, short-term denial can give a leader the time they need to rearrange their thinking and come to understand why everyone holds a different view. But usually, denial becomes so comfortable it replaces rational thought. Leaders who live in denial prefer not to know. They go on their merry way, denying any reality that is at odds with their view.
In so many historical instances, leaders are seen to ignore critical information, even when clearly informed of wrongs requiring action. In case after case, these leaders remained steadfast in their denial.
In many cases, people were hurt, abused, hazed, and suppressed because a leader believed not knowing was the least painful option. They willfully choose denial, justifying their ignorance by focusing their attention elsewhere.
The pride, arrogance, conceit, and status that give rise to denial usually pales in comparison to the simple idea of self-interest. Leaders who neglect their obligations to lead fail to confront a reality because it is often too uncomfortable or painful to acknowledge.
Too many leaders insist on living in denial to avoid the pain of being wrong, being exposed, or being less powerful than they desire. Or they believe accepting an alternate view will strip them of their influence and privilege.
If only they had come to grips with the reality earlier. Unfortunately, denial is a difficult force to break once it is embraced. Those closest to the leader must bend their ear and demand they at least examine the evidence others clearly see. Even then, the pain can be too much to bear. In extreme cases, denial then leads leaders to reject the people who confronted them and who they previously trusted the most.
Of all the reasons leaders lose their positions, legacies, and influence when others rip it away, denial is the prime culprit. Good leaders don’t live in denial about anything. Instead, they live in the fear they might let denial blind them to a reality they must act upon.
A Daily Dispatch from the Front Lines of Leadership.
