Many people, leaders included, operate based on their feelings. Their behaviors and choices reflect what they are feeling at any given moment. How they feel determines what they do or don’t do.
For instance, when things are going well and they feel positive, they are more likely to spend time with team members and dig into how they are doing.
When stressed, they avoid hard decisions and keep their distance from anything complex or taxing. When they feel positive about a team member, they invest in their development.
When they feel defensive, they shut down any feedback or criticism. For those who lead and live by feelings, their moods, emotions, and sentiments dictate many of the choices they make.
Almost by definition, people who lead and live by feelings are highly inconsistent. Because their feelings are shaped by their experiences, they engage very differently depending on what has most recently influenced them.
As their feelings change, so do their behaviors and decisions. Leading and living by feelings is a rollercoaster. Everyone allows their feelings to influence them at times, but effective leaders and people operate more on principles. Principles override feelings and allow people to achieve what they most desire.
On many days, leaders don’t feel like having a tough conversation, or listening deeply to others, or examining the team metrics, or being fully prepared for a meeting. For those committed to principles, they do those things anyway.
The core set of principles good leaders live and lead by allows them to stick to their guns. Principles get them to the gym when they don’t have the energy. Principles push them to do what they know they need to, regardless of their momentary feelings.
Too many principles can make people robotic and mechanical. But too few principles allow feelings to take over and control the actions we take or don’t take. A core set of principles makes all the difference.
What principles do you lead and live by? In other words, what commitments do you hold as non-negotiable regardless of how you feel? Consider writing down the principles you want to lead and live by.
Keep the list of personal rules and commitments tight enough so you can memorize them. Recite them to yourself often.
Treat your feelings as visitors that will come and go.
A Daily Dispatch from the Front Lines of Leadership.
