A Daily Dispatch from the Front Lines of Leadership.

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Have You Told Them?

Truth be told, we are often immensely proud of those special people we live with, work with, and learn from for what they have overcome, what they have achieved, and who they have become.  

When others learn we are proud of them, they experience a sense of delight unequaled in human emotion. This is especially true for those we have learned the most from, such as parents, teachers, grandparents, mentors, and coaches. 

Telling others who have made a major impact on us that we are proud of them is the rocket fuel of positive emotion. So why do we rarely tell them? 

We spend much of our lives trying to impress and prove ourselves to those who matter most to us. Telling those special people that we place them on a pedestal and hold them in the highest regard exposes our insecurities that we haven’t fully lived up to their example. Saying out loud that we are proud of them sounds like a gushing gob of sweetness reserved only for the wide-eyed amazement of obsequious people. Telling others we are proud of them can make us feel vulnerable by acknowledging our deep desire to replicate their best qualities. This kind of gooey exchange is highly uncomfortable. 

Unless your pride is so heartfelt it needs to be shared. 

Here’s an inside secret. If you are truly proud of someone, you need to tell them. Everyone benefits. They will beam like a searchlight has found their soul. You will experience the warm sensation that only the most honest human connection can produce. 

Making important others aware of our prideful feelings doesn’t always require the phrase, “I am proud of you.” In fact, having other ways to express your pride will allow you to share your feelings more frequently. 

  • “I’m in awe of your talent.” 
  • “I’m inspired by your example.” 
  • “I am lucky to know you.” 
  • “I’ve always been impressed by you.” 
  • “No one else can do what you do.” 
  • “I can’t stop bragging about you.” 
  • “I have always been honored to learn from you.” 

Everyone is profoundly proud of someone. We admire what they have accomplished. We are in awe of who they have become as people. We are amazed by what they have overcome. Not telling them frequently robs them of a joy no one else can give them. Keeping your pride in them to yourself steals from you the satisfaction of deep emotional connection to those you care most about. 

Don’t wait another minute. Tell those who have influenced you greatly that you are proud of them. Do it often. You’ll be proud of yourself for saying it. 

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