Good leaders don’t ask others to do things they don’t do first.
Seeking feedback is a prime example. Leaders who want team members to seek feedback need to do three things: ask for feedback, act on it, and tell the giver when it has had an impact.
Leaders who want others to seek their feedback begin by asking for theirs.
This doesn’t mean requesting a general evaluation of their leadership effectiveness. A much better place to start is simply seeking their specific views and feedback for you regarding a recent meeting, a project, or a strategic initiative.
Try asking a better question than “How did I do?” — a phrase that can come across as fishing for a compliment. “What is one thing I could do differently?” or “What were the best and worst aspects of how I led that project?” are much better queries.
Finding something they offer of value is essential.
Leaders who want to create an appetite for their feedback don’t need to yield or incorporate everything they hear about their own performance, but they do need to find that actionable item they can respond to.
Leaders show others that their feedback is valuable when they act on it. No matter how small the recommendation is, the leader must change the way they do things with that feedback in mind.
Lastly, it is critical for leaders to debrief with the team member and tell them about the influence, impact, or insight the feedback they offered had on them.
It’s not enough to act on the feedback. Good leaders go a step further and describe how important the suggestion was. Highlighting the feedback that has a material effect expresses both appreciation and underlines the mutual influence between the parties.
While the first two steps set the stage for increasing feedback appetite, this last move is what creates real hunger for learning what the leader has to say.
When leaders ask for, act on, and showcase the impact of the feedback team members give to the leader about their performance in a given instance, the nature of the relationship makes a sizeable shift.
Team members who experience this mutual influence are now primed to receive feedback and often ask for it. The demand for a leader’s feedback grows when they seek it first.
As a rule, team members won’t seek feedback from a leader until they have earned it. Be the kind of leader who makes others hungry for input.
